How to love yourself more?

The month of February is a reminder for all of us to cherish the bonds that we share with our partners. A reminder that we care and are grateful for their existence in our lives. Sounds amazing right? But why reserve that love for our partner only, why not devote that love to ourselves too?

I’m not talking about conventional ways of loving yourself like movie night, self-care, etc. All those things have a  place and they’re amazing. But today I’m talking about Loving yourself wholesomely, like there’s no tomorrow, accepting all your flaws, cherishing the moments when you made mistakes or failed, and embracing all your emotions. 

But how do you do that?

To love yourself, Understand yourself

To love yourself more, you need to understand yourself more. How’s your relationship with yourself? Rate your relationship with yourself on a scale of 10.

  • How do you treat yourself when you are alone?
  • How do you talk to yourself when you make a mistake or something goes wrong?
  • How often do you say NO?
  • What is your emotional state most of the time?
  • How are you feeling right now?

Remember awareness is the first step toward bringing change in our lives.

How does your inner dialogue go

What is that voice saying, what’s the underlying emotion behind that voice, what is it trying to tell you? Is it anger, fear, guilt, or shame? Don’t ignore it or push it away. Just be aware of the thoughts and emotions that come and go. 

Jot them down on a piece of paper and if you notice them closely, you will know they are just repetitive. You will also understand that the voice in your head is talking the same way your parents or guardians used to.  Can you imagine, that just a voice in your head has so much power over you?

Change within to Love yourself

Now when people become aware of it, they start to push these thoughts away, ‘ I don’t want to think this way, I don’t want to think about it, why aren’t they going away’ and when these thoughts don’t go they become more angry with themselves. They start to remember all those moments when they couldn’t make things right, how disappointed they felt, how they were not good enough etc.

Hold on a second, I want to know, will you talk to your child the same way you’re talking to yourself?

No. right? Then why are we so hard on ourselves? If we treat ourselves this way then how can we expect someone else to treat us better? Change starts at home and your body is that first place.

You cannot fly freely when you hold so much baggage. I know it’s tempting to control every aspect of your life to ensure your survival. But it’s doing less good and more harm. 

Release the control, talk to yourself like you are a child, explore your creativity, and follow your curiosity. Let life guide you.

One mind and Heart.

There’s no other person. There is only one mind and heart. That’s the reason why we refer to ourselves as I, the name of God. People are a reflection of our thoughts and emotions. How we think and feel within, decides what goes around us, what kind of people we meet, what situations we face, etc. But this doesn’t mean that you start to chant positive words and ignore your emotions. 

Allow yourself to feel more

No need to feel shameful for feeling those low vibrational thoughts and emotions. I know it’s hard to accept yourself when our world is so focused on the ‘good vibes only’ era. It feels sinful to have those thoughts and emotions like there’s no place for those thoughts and emotions.

No need to be so hard on yourself. Allow yourself to feel those emotions, you’re allowed to feel sad, angry, frustrated, jealous, etc. Let those emotions be there. The fact is that the more you try to resist these emotions, they will come up more. 

So to dissolve them, you’ve to allow them to be there. Let yourself feel those thoughts and emotions. 

With the power of your awareness, the energy of your thoughts and emotions will start to dissolve itself. No positive talk or action is needed. Your awareness is enough to change the frequency of your energetic field. 

You are doing such an amazing job, give yourself a break. Be gentle and kind to yourself. , the way you are to others. Do not let your mind tell you your worth, you are enough even if you do nothing at all.

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